Ten Words I'm Surprised are Real

The English language is very rich and diverse, receiving a heritage from many languages.Which is probably why it is such a mess. The grammar is convoluted, the spelling arbitrary at best. Why do we say better instead of gooder? Why is it alright to say faster, but not funner? Why is it i before e, except after c, unless there's an a as in neighbor and weigh? Weird, no? Keep in mind, this is coming from someone who who is obsessive about being correct in her grammar, but unlike most grammar Nazis I understand that one must approach the English language with caution and the understanding of the flexible nature of the language. (Spelling can just rot though.)

That brings me to the topic of this post. There are words in the English language that quite frankly don't make sense. Why would we even have that word? As well as the words that seem like they shouldn't be real, that sound made up. Here is a list of ten words I'm surprised are real. This isn't an official list of the ten most bazaar words, just ten words that made me do a double take. Some are fairly common words, some  are obscure, and others are weird slang. 

Splutter-a confused noise (as of hasty speaking)

Now this may be a surprising word to be in the list, but as embarrassing it is to admit, I only realized it was a real word in the last couple years. For the longest time I merely thought it was a deliberate and comical mispronunciation of the word "sputter."

Hooliganism-rowdy, violent, or destructive behavior. 

I knew hooligan was a word, but hooliganism sounds like someone was too lazy to find a different word, so they just slapped an ism at the end of the word hooligan.

Chillax-to calm down

I totally thought I made up this word. I don't remember having ever heard it, and when I first used it, it was after I thought I was being clever for combining the words chill and relax together. I was surprised (and slightly embarrassed) when I finally learned it had been a common slang since the late 90's.

Defenestration-the act of throwing someone or something out a window

Do we really need a word for this? I mean, in what context would you use this word, or even want to? It's like using antidisestablishmentarianism in a sentence. The few times you could use it, there is probably an easier way to say the same thing. 

Finnimbrun-a nick knack* 

An entirely superfluous word, but fun to say. 

Wallah-a person who is associated with a particular work or who performs a specific duty or service. 

It is a common enough word that I have known the meaning of a long time, but I can never take it seriously. 

Nocular-a word which can substitute any word.^ 

Now this word is basically slang, you can't even find it in any reputable dictionaries. The only place I could find  it was the Urban Dictionary There is a weird story behind this word being among the chosen. Many of you will recall a strange ice-cream (sort of) treat called dip an' dots. The containers they came in were roughly shaped like binoculars, and I said as much. Katy, my older sister, misheard me and thought I said the containers were nocular. From then on it became a thing in my family to call something nocular if we weren't sure how else to describe it, more as a joke than anything else. One day I actually looked it up, curious to see if it was a real word. It may only be found in the urban dictionary, but I was surprised to see that the way we had been using the word was a way that others had been using it as well. 

Tyrotoxism-to be poisoned with cheese*

I feel this word speaks for itself. 

Inimitable-not capable of being imitated

This was actually the word of the day at Marriam Webster and when I saw the definition it seemed to break every single assumption I had made about the word. I guess I just though that it should mean the opposite of what it actually does. In is a very strange prefix, at times it mean in the positive, such as the word inflammable  and invaluable. But apparently it can also negate the meaning of something as well. 

She'd've-she would have

Seriously? I admit, I use contractions, but a double contraction seems a little excessive. Unless you're using 'tisn't, but only because it sound Shakespearean.

Even though not everyone will be surprised at this collection of words, it can not be doubted that at least of few of them are truly weird, 

* Definition reworded from my own brain. ``

^Definition from Urban Dictionary ``

``All other definitions from Marriam Webster.